it's fall and gosh so many memories struck me suddenly. it didn't hit me until now, but now i understand. isn't it strange. lately i have been questioning myself. wondering what is this feeling coming over me and then all of a sudden, the answer hit me. i am so glad. i don't know what it is about life, but it just has its way. i know i am an ambigious person, but what can i say that is the way i am. even as i write it i have all these thoughts, random of course, but never unleashed. composure. i must always sustain that cause it is my world.

i often wonder, who reads this? onto other things. memories, they are an almighty powerful weapon. sure we can control them, but can we really? lately i have been watching too much tv. i really gotta get off it.

but as i was saying. memories. whenever it rains i become nostalgic. why is that? i don't exactly know yet, or maybe i do, but it hasn't fully dawned on me yet. My recent awakening has caused me to think. more than usual that is. but yeah, lately i have been in deep thought. about what, you ask? about life, about the future. about the past, about the present. pretty much everything. i feel even my life is a multi-task. i think television is my tunnel, my escape. because then, i can't dwell in deeep thought. i think my rant has gotten a little too extreme that even i can't grasp what is going on. so let me slow things down and breathe a little.

the winter is nearing so the season is just right around the corner. i don't know if i'll be able to board. gotta find an orthopedic person to check out my knee. i been working out more lately. back to 5 days a week. would be more, but i am pretty busy these days.

feeling so lazy, i really need to be more active or study more. i am growing tired of tv. blah blah blah. enough said.